Monday, December 20, 2004
Devil's Dictionary
One of my favorite writers. Ambrose Bierce is mostly known for writing "The Devil's Dictionary" (Where he would take words and re-define them in his usual satirical/cynical fashion).
This brilliant man gave us such classics as:
"Acquaintance : A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to".
"Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum: I think that I think, therefore I think that I am".
"Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility".
"Dawn: When men of reason go to bed".
"Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm".
"Education, n.: That which discloses the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding".
"Egotist: A person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me".
"Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel".
"Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage".
"Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing".
"Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy".
"Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited".
"Sweater, noun.: A garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly".
"War: God's way of teaching Americans geography".
This brilliant man gave us such classics as:
"Acquaintance : A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to".
"Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum: I think that I think, therefore I think that I am".
"Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility".
"Dawn: When men of reason go to bed".
"Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm".
"Education, n.: That which discloses the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding".
"Egotist: A person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me".
"Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel".
"Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage".
"Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing".
"Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy".
"Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited".
"Sweater, noun.: A garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly".
"War: God's way of teaching Americans geography".
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"Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum: I think that I think, therefore I think that I am".
Hilarious ! .. Keep'em coming ..
Hilarious ! .. Keep'em coming ..
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