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One of my favorite writers. Ambrose Bierce is mostly known for writing "The Devil's Dictionary" (Where he would take words and re-define them in his usual satirical/cynical fashion).

This brilliant man gave us such classics as:

"Acquaintance : A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to".

"Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum: I think that I think, therefore I think that I am".

"Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility".

"Dawn: When men of reason go to bed".

"Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm".

"Education, n.: That which discloses the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding".

"Egotist: A person of low taste, more interested in himself than in me".

"Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel".

"Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage".

"Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing".

"Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy".

"Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited".

"Sweater, noun.: A garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly".

"War: God's way of teaching Americans geography".